after talking with a guest, i want to get out of here even more.

not because of the guest or anything we talked about/said to each other, but because the fact that i'm even now at the end of my time here beginning to discover things, about life and art and everything. it scares me.

im scared by the prospect of suddenly coming to a conclusion that perhaps i haven't thought that i would and that potentially the suprise could kill me.

i just used the word kill, thats quite strange, i think i was gunning more towards "could drive me insane".

i've also just noticed how more and more my thought process has become more and more narrative.

i'm not quite sure whats happening but i'm delightfully scared but not as much as i would be if i was in here for another extended period of time.